Woodloch Bonding

Oh boy, somebody up there likes me! 

Or at least, likes me enough to give me a sunny forecast, exciting itinerary, and lots of unparalleled, unadulterated bliss.

I was too tired to post yesterday.. the kind of tired you get from being too freakin’ happy to even think about resting,  or breathing, or anything that doesn’t involve complete and utter absorption of  merriment but it was a fabulous day that needs to be permanently recorded on a blog.

We started off with scavenger hunt.. and a gold medal!! 

And I contributed just a tad by recognizing obscure logos  and trademarks from companies, part of the puzzle solving part of the hunt. We were joined by   a family of four.. newbies to Woodloch.. who got to experience the magic of the winning medal on their first try!

We did a lot of family bonding in the lake with extended family. 

Not my DNA connections exactly.. my kin won’t commit.. but my sister in law Jane’s crew, and they are wonderful people.

And great sports as they attended the crazy and messy “Double Dare” game, where one event literally involved rolling in mud. ( the kids.. the adults are sane)

I participated in this game one year— I found myself getting drenched in a baby pool filled with oatmeal.. and  then got attacked by even more oatmeal filled super squirters. I washed it all off in the lake.. making lots of very hungry  fish really really happy! 

So happy that they wanted to stay in Woodloch forever.. like everyone in our group.

 

When I promise you this resort caters to all ages and ailments you gotta believe that they do. The grounds are hilly and challenging for someone like me: the golf cart drivers treat me like Cinderella in her coach without a hint of judgement.

We almost won yet another coveted gold medal.. one mix up of a James Bond title and our hopes were dashed but our spirits were  sky high.

The professional theme show was broadway caliber, especially the Disney tribute. Glorious costumes, spectacular choreography, voices of angels.. put ‘em all together and you have a deliriously happy audience, even the young parents with toddlers falling asleep on their shoulders as they hummed along to popular hits from “Frozen.”

The comic was new and unforgettably good, even though I can’t recall his name at the moment. 

That’s funny, isn’t it?

Today was just as special.. our chaotic household turned off the tv and put aside the scattered living room toys and donned their matching tshirts that read  “Karen.. Calm Down!” 

To venture outside for fun.

And  we did just that as we gathered for the scenic boat tour on a pontoon. Even my fifteen month old great nephew couldn’t stop smiling.

The boat ride was followed by a scrumptious cookout on the lawn and a carnival.  

There’s nothing like the face of a child who just won her own  set of jacks in a rubber ducky race.

I contributed nothing to the Disney game but my teammates got the gold medal just the same..  and I just sat there with the right amount of guilt,  wiped away when I handed over my medal to my great niece for simply being the greatest great  niece in this great big world. 

Who probably knows more trivia than I do.

Lots of brain power went into our next activity, “You Be the Judge “ where long time staff member  Randy made us think and made us laugh as “ juries” who tried to predict the outcomes of very bizarre but very real court cases. 

Even guests who are practicing attorneys couldn’t accurately guess the verdict. (S)

But do they ever have fun deliberating!

Been lazing lakeside for a good part of the afternoon, now heading back for a home style thanksgiving dinner with all the trimmings.

Could get used to this.

I could get used to vacationing in paradise.

One last update before heading out: the thanksgiving dinner was as delicious as and as comforting as you’d imagine, the final show was a rousing musical tribute to the movies , interspersed with goofy videos of the most beloved staff members, and finally, out private group branched off for endless laughs in the intimate card room.  

The debate was on in the lobby across from the room, but I’d only look up to watch the cackling logs  in the adjacent  fireplace instead.

Nothing was going to spoil my mood!

We’re all a little teary as we’re packing up.. this is going to be a long year until we return, but my nephew just shared a fascinating and terrifying story that apparently happened last night, when the whole family witnessed a bear retrieving a Hefty bag from a bin, flinging it over its shoulder, and dashing into the woods with it.

I’m guessing the bag contained the bare necessities.. and that, coincidentally, was the trivia answer that got the team a medal!

Third reference to Disney, I know, but if you have kids or the ability to act like a kid, come here instead.

Wet, wild and wonderful

You know how sometimes when there’s a game, whether it’s a  boxed classic you’re playing with friends at your kitchen table, or  it’s something advertisers pay a lot of money for to have their product hawked on a popular network  show, that anything can and often will.. happen?

Take a breath Karen, this runoff sentence is about to leap off the page, but you know how when you answer incorrectly under the circumstances I’ve described above, a penalty might be a missed turn or the deduction of points??

Welcome to Woodloch, where even penalties are  freaking hilarious!!

After a weird night of  a programming shift, ( the Taylor Swift event attracted Swiftes and the ventriloquist canceled at the last minute.. making my witty brother Steven quip, “ I guess he threw his voice a little too far!”) we had to rethink our itinerary.

 We didn’t  want to play the replacement event, Bingo,  so we made our own fun in a private room( omg.. not only are my sentences running, my sexual innuendo would make Stormy Daniels blush) with some hilarious rounds of Balderdash with  the beloved witty brainiacs who make up our adopted Woodloch family.

Some of our gang hung out at the fire pit,  roasting marshmallows and/ or playing shuffleboard or Giant Jenga and corn hole, before gathering in Woodloch’s cozy North Lodge for a millennial/ Gen Z driven game popularized by Jimmy Fallon called “That’s My Jam.”

Our team was great, but a wrong didn’t  just mean a missed turn or a humiliating red “X” over the unlucky guesser’s head.

It meant getting zapped by a water gun..  a super squirter, no less!!.. at night.. in an air conditioned room! 

Victims were laughing so hard that I’m predicting they’ll still be laughing after the pneumonia is diagnosed.

I cannot wait to see what’s on schedule today, but I’m guessing it’ll be wet, wild, and wonderful!

Let the games begin

I don’t care if you don’t have the chutzpah to rob a bank or the luck of the Irish to win the sweepstakes,  you simply must figure out how to make this work,  and hop in your car and come to Woodloch, so, like me, you can soak up the sun in a lounge chair and watch a  stunning painting  come to life. 

It is so gorgeous with  it’s shimmering slate blue  lake with ripples that turn into waves when a boat speeds by(so you can justify the price because you will feel like you’re  actually in the Caribbean) while enjoying the bluest skies and the puffiest clouds and the sensuous air.

Jim, Evan, and Michelle opted to play six silly and  challenging Disney themed games by the lake. They were one ring toss on Pinocchio’s nose away from winning a medal, but the “Be Our Guest” food challenge sounded insanely fun. Michelle had to eat some mushrooms and Evan practically bathed in ketchup. 

Don’t ask.

Meanwhile, I branched out on my own and joined  a team called “Let’s All Go to the Movies” and earned a gold medal.

Sure,  it’s not rocket science to recognize The Scarecrow’s anthem, but would you know that “Lady Marmalade “ was from “Moulin Rouge?”

Would you recognize the famous spaghetti  western theme song that’s simultaneously good and bad and ugly? 

Not to mention the  intense pressure it takes to watch less than ten seconds of a movie  clip and  then identify the film.

The amount of imagination , originality, and  inspiration that go into creating these challenges is mind boggling.

If you have a smidgen of athletic ability, this place makes you feel like you Lebron James. You solve a puzzle and you fancy yourself a highly socialized version of Stephen Hawking.

It’s a special place because of how special it makes you feel.

On tap tonight: Taylor Swift, ventriloquists, and a whole lotta love!

Another woodloch masterpiece

Just a few months ago, I was on that “other” type of vacation, with just Jim and his camera and an educational  itinerary. We took a river cruise and explored the Pacific Northwest, and it made me think about the final chapters of  the eventually written Book  of Karen . 

Somehow, I don’t hear my dying, raspy voice saying something like, “I am so glad I got to see Mt. St. Helen’s on a  really clear day!”

Now, site seeing is fine, it really is, but it would not give me that pure , utter , positively contagious joy that I’m experiencing now with my family as we’re welcomed back to Woodloch Pines.

Our thirty fifth time over two decades.. and worth every well spent penny.

Seeing the familiar faces of the family that’s been operating this little slice of heaven since the fifties, coupled with seeing my own family for the first time in months, filled my heart with unparalleled happiness..something that seeing faces on Mt. Rushmore could never do, even if I could remember which order the faces were positioned in.

I’ve been here for less than twenty four hours and it seems like a week.

From a scrumptious meal and the unmatched hospitality from those who served it to me, I just sat there in the cozy dining room,staring at the lake glistening in the sun, feeling the buzz and excitement from all the  sated guests, and witnessing butts of all all shapes and sizes leaping out of those chairs at the same time to watch a bear darting along the shoreline from a vast picture window.

It was a fairytale beginning.

I got much vicarious pleasure—the best kind— watching Evan and his wonderful girlfriend Michelle as they mouthed the words and danced in unison to a Broadway caliber show saluting “Dance Through the Decades.”

While they swayed and shimmied with Marissa, Jim and I joined our adopted family, whom we’ve been trying to earn those coveted medals with for over a decade, in a brand new “Match” game. We didn’t win a medal, but we made a lot of memories and laughed  a lot and argued a lot.

(“What will the majority of players say the most popular show on Broadway is “ and you insist the answer will be “Hamilton” and they say “Wicked” and they were right and you were wrong and you apologize, and for the first time in your life, apologizing …is something fun!!)

What do you think the players said when prompted to name the most popular movie directed by Steven Spielberg? And how much would you berate yourself for narrowing it down to two answers and choosing incorrectly??

It was a great evening, topped off by the late arrival of my nephew and his crew from Maryland.

We always bring gifts for the kiddos.. I’d rather see  their live reactions than hear about them if we mailed them something.

We knew while breezing through the Amazon catalogue that my one year old great nephew would love his new talking hamster, who we called Jim Hamster, but we didn’t know the extent of that immediate love, and believe me when I tell you that storing the look on his face  in my memory bank meant more to me than seeing the Eiffel Tower.

We have a beautiful forecast and a jam packed day filled with activities that cater to all ages and I can’t wait until everyone gets up.

Except the bear.

The bear can sleep in as long as he wants.

It’s nice to be home!

Memories of the flyers loving father

I can just picture him..clear as a bell

I can just picture him..healthy and well

I can just picture him, cheering his Flyers

or fixing a door while he wielded his pliers

I can just picture him, wrestling mutt,  Sandy..

or making kids laugh..tossing Halloween candy

I can just picture him driving his Ford..

or turning off talk shows because he was bored..

I can just picture him..cutting salami..

with cutting remarks..(A great sport was my Mommy!)

I can just picture him splash in the pool..

he didn't give a damn about playing  the fool.

I can just picture that schmuck who misdialed

(Dad answered their calls like a mischievous child)

I can just picture his lottery dream!

and cherry vanilla--his favorite ice cream..

I can just picture him on our front lawn

(although it's been thirty five years that he's gone)

I can just picture sports talk there in ... heaven..

Or trash talking Trump with his namesake, our Evan..

I've looked back this morning..was not hard to find..

those pictures I picture..they  live in my mind.

Happy Father's Day to E. Michael Levson, and to the best Dad in the country, the Dad who'd be a multi-millionaire if "Dad" could be a required course in schools throughout our nation, namely my better half, Jim Amster!

Beach-loch

That beach and that lawn!/what spectacular greenery!/it’s gorgeous at dawn/drinking in all the scenery/ I enter the lake/so keyed up for the swim/ it’s chilly.. I take it all in..(so does Jim!) /the blue of the sky! /each puffy white cloud/ the spirit is high/ with that sunbathing crowd/the kids on the dock!/some-giggling, some thrashing/the shore birds might flock/ and the teens can’t stop splashing!/ a kayak sails by/the tots think it’s funny/they wave at the guy/ who has just caught a sunny/a four year old grins/ we can all feel her pride/ with great care, she begins/ and she’s there.. on that slide!/some folks take a book/ to relax or to laze/ or just take a look as the sun is ablaze/ it’s magic! Spectacular! Year after year!/ we got the vernacular/ that’s why we’re here/ yes, poems are made by fools like me.. to describe woodloch’s lure.. I hope.. eloquently!