Listen to me, you stupid little brain of mine!
Stop with the worst case scenario stuff.
This is not 2020--you have great things to look forward to!
Woodloch is coming!
A magnificent Club Med trip is coming on your anniversary!
A pool party is scheduled as a mini reunion with your Philly crowd!
You're getting to see one of your favorite authors, David Sedaris, speak live in the fall!
So stop, brain!
Stop obsessing about bears, and alligators in PENNSYLVANIA lakes, (!!!????)and running into people you don't want to see, and ptomaine poisoning, and returning home without a medal or a coffee mug.
Stop worrying about being kidnapped in the tropics, or losing your Kindle at a climactic part of the book.
Stop fretting about cowlicks.. they're NOT going to pop up because you HAD THAT EXPENSIVE TREATMENT!!
Stop worrying about the 3:00 AM call you'll get that will result in the trip's cancellation.
The catastrophes are in your head.
Brain..what do you say we do a crossword puzzle or play Scrabble?
Anything to stop this doomsday nonsense..
I mean it, brain!!
STFU!
Next time I notice that you're thinking about the Delta virus, I'm going to force you to think about all those episodes of "Designing Women" and how much you enjoyed DELTA Burke as Suzanne Sugarbaker.
No, Luke is not going to be attacked by a coyote if you let him out tonight.
No, your new bathing suit won't fall off when you jump off the board..and what if it does?? So what??
Brain, even STOMACH is laughing at your inability to enjoy life..
Be like STOMACH.
Have a cookie
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