Sausage Party

Saturday's word: "Ovaltine"

Today's word: "Sausage"

Today's opinion: Regensburg Germany has been the best excursion(tied with Salzburg) so far.

Here's what Google will tell you:  In 1517, Emporor Maximillian I remarked that Regensburg surpassed every other German city with its outstanding and vast buildings. The city is 2000 years old and has cobblestone lanes and alleys containing fascinating houses from many epochs. Many mansions have high towers built by noble families to emphasize their status. In 2006, the whole of the city has been declared a Unesco World Heritage Site.

Highlights are the old stone bridge, St. Peter's Cathedral, old city hall, old chapel, a closed museum named for a dead astronomer(Kepler) and a museum of history--as if the whole excursion--this whole trip--wasn't one huge museum of history.

But you don't come to this blog for that...

For of all, as I was jotting these notes and Jim was exploring more alleys, I guy supposedly from the ship whom I didn't recognize because I'm facially blind asks me if I'm going to Nuremberg. I answer "no"..he tells me his real name is Charles Dickens...walks away..

..and...

we're off to the kind of blog most of you want to read.

Let me give you a little background on the folks I've been doing most of the excursions with, the white team, we "gentle walkers" with our canes, walkers, recent surgeries, pot bellies, asthma,,ancient sciatica, and flip  phones:

We started off a lot larger than we are now.

And compared to everyone else, I am Usain Bolt.

Betty never left the ship at all today.

Poor Betty..(Warning:  I have to go off topic)

I felt bad ditching her for our anniversary last night(last night's date WAS November 5th--that's my story and I'm sticking to it) and our table for two was next to another pair--a wonderful couple from San Francisco.  She is a retired psychology professor and it was just a refreshing change to talk with world travelers who share our politics.

Well..it's not that Betty doesn't...

She just needs to branch out with other singles.  Maybe tonight, Betty can be seated with Veronica and Jughead.

There's a fun single nurse(like Betty!) named Gloria who is here with her two other single gal pals, also slow walkers but they really love to shop.  I asked Gloria if her friends were as white as she was before I realized how rude the question was...They're all from NJ, which is note worthy, because most passengers forget names.  We just refer to each other as "why hello, Mr. Arizona!" and "how did you like Budapest, Missouri?"

Mr. Monopoly takes the slow tours too and BTW, he is a very talented painter and overall cool guy who didn't even light up.  And his platonic companion Henrietta is so British and hilarious and perky and bold and cool that she made me realize what a cool name Henrietta is, although her friends call her "Aitch."  She is a pistol..see the pic!

So many members of the white team pooped out by the time we crossed the bridge.  There's the lifelong Republican, a former state senator from Kansas(but he thinks Cheeto is an embarrassment) and Mr. Monopoly(real name:  Justin) and a few other panting stragglers.

This village was a little less Hansel and Gretel than I anticipated but it was still charming and snow-globish. 

I'm taking an awfully long, winding, cobblestone road (see??  See??  Do you like it???  Are YOUR calves aching?) just to make a point as to why this is so 'effing great..

..turns out I am absolutely cuckoo for cuckoo clocks!

And no, I didn't buy one, because I think the sound of "The Happy Wanderer" ("Val-der-i..Val-der-rah!") and even "Edelweiss" would makes me nuts if I had to hear them every hour, but the demo we saw held my interest more than any religious story of vengeful kings and city wide plagues ever did.

I tell Lorelei how great her English is.

She tells me she is Lori from California, and married a German only a few years ago.

We learned about the artistry of the Black Forest, and the hand carvings, and pendulums and weights of gilded pinecones. We learned about stone and oakwood, electric vs. mechanical, one day vs. one week winding.. We learned about figurines who danced and sang, who ascended ladders to steal kisses from brides sold to different grooms.  We learned about red pom poms, and their significance to single women, while the black pom poms meant the married women were off limits. We saw clocks that actually have real running water. and we learned about bellows and up and down motions and "Swiss Magic", meaning the clocks can only operate after contacting a wooden surface. We were treated to detailed artwork showing scenes from the Black Forest, and an axman who probably had carpal tunnel syndrome that was less severe than mine after all this typing.

I've shared this in previous blogs:  I have the emotional maturity of a four year old, so ask any pre-schooler what would be better before bedtime:  A fairytale or a boring history lesson.  

(Unless watching Jimmy Kimmel was an option...)

This excursion included lunch, which explains the beginning of this blog:  We heard the word sausage and sausage fest a lot. 

 Some jokes just write themselves..

We crammed inside a tiny room made of wood(didn't want to chance breathing in cigarettes outside) and guess who likes sauerkraut?  This isn't a trick question--paprika still sucks but sauerkraut at the sausage kitchen is terrific!

We were given a basket of what I thought were unlimited rolls(many euros later, we learned there is no such word as unlimited) that tasted like fresh baked rye bread from your favorite Jewish deli.  

And then came the sausages..six crispy, sweet, savory, crunchy, incredibly delicious little weiners that we slathered with sweet tangy mustard.

This, my friends, is the stuff that dreams are made of.  And I  didn't even mention how we broke into show tunes on the long ride home!

Great day!