Uuahouua

good morning, early risers! 

We are en route to Melk, Austria

(Fucking Austria,  is not on the schedule) 

Au revoir to our first stop, the picturesque village of Durnstein.  It doesn't rhyme with composer Leonard, it rhymes with..well..I think you have to be from this region to pronounce it.

We "gentle walkers" boarded a miniature train that looked like a life sized Christmas ornament and took a gorgeous ride through the vineyards to this little town built on a rock..or in a rock??  I'm not that good with my prepositions.

Hildegarde was our choo choo's narrator and she pointed out the apricot groves and wineries, and I found myself wishing that my name was something like Heidi so I'd feel more at home.

We saw where Richard the Lionhearted was imprisoned, and it looked like a majestic schloss.  (That means "castle" for those of you reading named something other than Heidi.)

We saw the sparkling Danube with the mountains and mountain homes perched above.  Oh, and you can rest assured that the Danube is clean.  It is a two or three on a scale of one to ten, with drinkable water being a one.

We passed a wine shop and Jim took a photo, but even if he zooms in, nobody is going to be able to read the name on the table.  It started and ended with about ten letters "u's" and had more vowels in between.  Think of Charlie Brown's teacher  and you can probably pronounce the wine.

The village, with all its cobblestoned alleys and turrets and hand painted signs looks like it is possibly made out of gingerbread.  I can't swear to you that it isn't.

Oh!!  And I was a wing man (wing woman?) for Betty.  He used a cane and looked exactly like Mr. Monopoly..I'm pretty sure I saw a monocle. He sounded like he could be part of the Monty Python troupe and they were getting on famously, but then Mr. Monopoly lit a cigarette, so we had to say so long, farewell, to my pimping attempts. 

We took a choo choo back to the dock(it really was an amusement park kiddie ride) and boarded around 10:30, heading for our next destination.

Next time I talk, PLEASE..I beg of you..IGNORE me.

You know how I always bitch about hating travel and tourism trips??

Well..I couldn't be more wrong!!

We went to the sun deck and drank in the indescribable sites, like stones that had faces if you looked carefully enough, and strips of green vineyards beautifying that which was already beautiful.

I love "non-touring" vacations because I love to  sit by a beach and veg and stare at beautiful water while reading a good book, and I got exactly that.  The ride was calm and leisurely, but instead of reading my own book, a book was read to me,,and all the other "M-E-S's" by our wonderful cruise director.  The sun was warm, the wind was gentle.  We saw a castle that was visited by Princess Diana and Dodi shortly before the tragedy: we saw tiny manicured homes and I guarantee that every one of us senior citizens felt like we were four, and our parents were reading us fairytales set in magical settings. (Although the fairytales we heard as kids never mentioned Richard the Lionhearted pooping on the Austrian flag as an act of vengeance)

Cutest kid's t-shirt:  "This is AUSTRIA..no kangaroos here!"

Off to drink in a tall glass of M-E-L-K at the M-E-L-K Abbey.