Ham and cheese rage

What a nice start to a much needed vacation.

 I didn't get my newspaper, which means I can't relax and do my crossword puzzle, and..trust me..I NEED to relax.

The show I was looking forward to is not on schedule tonight, even 'though it had been  scheduled EVERY Monday night this month.

It's a juggler instead. 

 I'd like him to juggle the thoughts going through my head right now.

All three of us over packed, and just as Evan was getting some stuff from his car, parked safely on the street, he discovered something he's never discovered on his car before: 

 A slice of  pimento-laced bologna, clinging to the driver side window. 

 Three slices of cheese were on the street near his tires.

My poor son hasn't lived home for over two years and he gets cheesed for no freaking reason.  No reason at all..

I'm assuming the birds got the bread, but who the hell throws a ham and cheese sandwich at a visitor's car?

I'm guessing it was drunken teenagers, or a bored Englishman from 1990 who rolled down his window and asked:  "Pardon me..do you have any Grey Poupon?" and once he realized there was nobody actually  in the car, he threw his sandwich in a bit of road rage.

I'm not sure if I'm entering a beloved sitcom or high drama but I'll tell you this:  I better come home with at least a bronze medal.