The 80s mouse trap

oh yes, I've got stuff to say. 

 A blogger's work is never done, even when she she's not all that engaging  in the first place, and nothing of importance happened today

Well..that's sorta true..

The schedule had activities  like "walk-in Botox consultation" and "free diamond jewelry cleaning" which made that "tingling" thing from earlier sound like a can't miss activity--the kind of activity that would give you major YOLO if you blinked and missed it.

 We started the day off in the theater, where we were shown a wonderful film that described what we're about to see in the upcoming days. The narrator eagerly explained that "Alaska Smells Like Christmas" and I was wondering if a semi-non-believer like myself would benefit from that knowledge, but I do love the smell of cinnamon and vanilla.

After the film, we played a version of "Name That Tune" using popular emojis to help identify the title, and the game  proved once again that the staff members here  are sadists.

Really David?  You show us a snail and a turtle emoji  and we're supposed to know that it's "Despacito"..the Spanish word for "slow?"

What's the Spanish word for "you're a monster?"

I no longer worry that we may miss a bear sighting in Alaska, 'cause I saw one today, on the ship, sitting across from me at a sit-down lunch.

Don't poke a "hangry" Jim..and don't complain that you don't feel like carrying trays in a buffet line with a bunch of sickly sumo wrestlers, because..well..you gotta trust me on this.

Don't be around him when he's waited over thirty minutes for lunch, especially when the server comes by after that long wait, asking you to refresh his memory and tell him what you ordered.

We didn't even bother waiting for dessert,,just made a stop at a yummy gelato shop and tried to decide if it was too cold outside on the deck.

Shortly after, we found ourselves playing an "awesome  80's" trivia "game with a mother/daughter team from Indiana.

(Thus I came up with our clever team name:  "Indiana Jersey and the Temple of Doom")

We got sixteen of the twenty answers correct, which made us the ultimate winners of a pack of playing cards, and two contraptions that looked like mouse traps. 

 (Mice traps?)

My techie husband had no idea what these mouse traps actually were--cell phone holders--but we're talking about the same guy who purchased a state-of-the-art laptop without measuring the size of his blogger wife's fingertips.

The four of us are enjoying our prize, peacock proud that we knew that F. Murray Abraham won an Oscar for "Amadeus" and that the 1980 summer Olympics were held in Moscow.

The atrium starts to empty out when we're approached by a mob of..I'd say..six or seven people, and they did not look one bit happy. 

 They looked like they were following the orders of Gaston,

 to kill the beast(us pop culture nerds) with their fiery hot torches.

"Were you the folks who won?" the leader demanded.

"Yes, that's us,  thank you, " I answer, because I cannot read vocal tones.

"WHAT DID YOU PUT for question number sixteen?" he continued, the one that asked:  "Which 1984 movie did John Hughes write in just two days?"

"Um..the right answer??  We wrote "The Breakfast Club?"

Gaston pounds his fists on a cocktail table as his gang follows suit.

"The Breakfast Club" came out in 1985!!  We googled it!"

"Yes..and I go to film school so I should KNOW!" offered Gaston's daughter. "WE had the right answer..WE wrote "Sixteen Candles"..NOT you!"

I sheepishly hung my head.  

"Um..we have an extra mouse trap..we can share.."

"You don't understand!!  We GOGGLED it.  "Sixteen Candles" came out in 1984, not YOUR answer!"

I have never been so scared in my life and they walked away, practically on fire.

Jim googles John Hughes films and realizes they were right.."The Breakfast Club" did indeed come out in 1985.

But the voice in my head, the one that tells me that carbs are good and evangelists are bad, told me that I absolutely read somewhere that "The Breakfast Club's" script was written in two days.  My brain has never betrayed me when it has stored useless pop culture trivia in the past, so this time, I make Jim google, "how long did it take for John Hughes to write "The Breakfast Club" and guess the hell what??

The answer is..TWO DAYS!!

So yeah, Team Gaston, I don't care how many times you run into me on a glacier or in the elevator, I'm keeping that mousetrap.

The same sadist ran a second game called "yes/no" and it was an absolute hoot.  Volunteers had to refrain from using either of those words, or the facial gestures that illustrate them, under a two minute timer and it really is impossible.

I don't know how I would have responded had he asked me if "The Breakfast Club" came out in 1984 or not.  Either answer would have given me the boot.

Tonight's dress theme is a salute to the 80's.  Jim didn't bring any acid-washed jeans but he has been wearing paint-stained sweats for four days in a row,

I want to dress up Samantha from "16 Candles" just to mess with Gaston and his family, but I don't have any underwear with little red hearts on them.

There I go again..talking about underwear out of nowhere.

Jim wants to get another walk in before our Steakhouse dinner, and I told him to go to the gift shop for a disposable razor and maybe some Bonine as the sea is getting a tad rockier..and Tylenol."

"They'll give me the third degree if I try to buy anything for pain.

What should I tell them?"

I answer:  "Tell them your wife is a Karen, and she cheated on her Covid test."

Or..just get me the damn stuff..

Stay tuned..exciting Alaskan adventures to be chronicled shortly, unless I get quarantined.