Thank you weather gods for bringing us safely to Club Med Guadeloupe in the French West Indies, and don't ask me where they are because I still don't know. How do you thank weather gods anyway? By avoiding shellfish?? Done!! We had a wonderful flight on Norwegian Air(so much leg room) and arrived here with time to spare, and I immediately say to Jim: "WTF?" which I'd translate into "Whoa..This's FRENCH!" if I thought "this's" is a real word. Our wonderful Travel Agent, Christine Cherry Hommel, did warn us that this resort is extremely french but I wanted to try it anyway. We finally meet people who spoke English who shared our transfers to the resort. She said she was from Laurel Maryland and I'm thinking, "My Mom's name was Laurel!" She tells me she was last in Guadeloupe in the early 80's as a single, to which Jim replies: So did I!" She then tells me her name is Cathy, and she's traveling with her sister Patty, and we simultaneously offer: "As in "The Patty Duke Show!" Cathy then offers that she has just one child, a son, and I'm thinking this is becoming freakishly coincidental, until she says her son's name is Tahir and studied film at NYU under Spike Lee's tutelage and just made an indie called "I'm Gonna Get You Douche Bag!" and I offer that mine studies hard and likes football. I thought the coincidences were done, until she tells me she's here to celebrate a milestone birthday and I chime in with "me too!" She says hers is Wednesday, January 27th and I add: Me too!" She then says she's turning sixty and I was about to remark about how uncanny that was until we compared more notes and I realize I'm five hours older. I have less than 36 hours to be fifty nine, so no premature birthday wishes please. (Except for the fabulous poem I received before departure from the hilarious Arlene Nisson Lassin) I have zero problem admitting I'm 60..hell, I'll tell you my age, my weight and salary(if you have the chutzpah to ask, and my answer would be a lie anyway) and my social security number if I could remember it. Jane Fonda calls sixty "the third act"..but she doesn't discuss the amount of scenes in said third act. I don't have much in common with Jane Fonda anyway, except for for feminism and politics, and also, she once dropped the C-bomb on "The Today Show" and I drop the C-Bomb every time Ann Coulter is on. Also, in my 20's, people said I looked a little like her, especially from her "Klute" days. Even I see a similar look in the night swimming scene from "On Golden Pond." Jane Fonda and I could still look alike if only I..if only we..if only she would care less about injecting botox and her frozen facial features and more about frozen yogurt.
'I'm getting jealous of Jim. He is mastering french, and I mean way beyond "meringue" and "mon chien et Luke." I don't even care that I have a dog named Luke, so why should anyone else? I said to Jim, "what if I pronounce it Luc?:"but now that he's mastering the language, he is not impressed. Plus, Luke and Luc are pronounced the same
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