Zorba the "Geek"..

How lucky can a gal get?  I run a successful meth lab, I have a husband who understands my acquired humor, and I'm getting my underwear back in a few hours. I hope we see another real volcano en route to Greece today. (Yeah, I know..I'm so busy being a whiny bitch that I forgot to post something exciting..like we sailed by a volcano with steam coming out of it yesterday) Jim has been absorbing everything he can about our next destination. (He is AB-Sorba the Geek) C'mon, I can be contrived once every blog entry-- but let us proceed. We stopped at the excursions desk yesterday, basically to determine whether I'll survive Athens or not. I exaggerated my "sciatica" but the rep still said the trip might not be recommended for me but I'm not going to disappoint Jim! I AM going to Athens even if it kills me. I'm not even doing this just for him..part of the trip includes seeing seaside scenery(talk about a tongue twister, which we weren't so this is just me being ADD because there's a morgue on the ship)and I WANT to see things that the cast and crew of "Before Midnight" and "The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants" saw. If either of those films had taken place inside the Acropolis and showed old and/or out of shape people passing out by the 60th  crumbling step they would have been box office flops.  So I AM going to Greece, and paying extra to wait  alone in the museum, and taking the emergency numbers and Jim's cell just in case someone forgets about me. What are the odds that Royal Caribbean Cruise Line would pair us with a doctor (a former cruise ship doctor!!)and his wife who campaigns for HRC? Look, I'd like Dr. Kevin even if he ran a print shop in Pittsburgh because he is so funny and sweet and SMART and he  evidently likes beef. But he's a great doctor, and a non biased one. We had this wonderful meal(Duncan and Hines showed up but mostly to smile and nod politely and sip wine) but we mostly talked to Dr. Kevin and Melinda while looking at a dining room full of people in stunning gowns and tuxedos. I was so comfortable with Kevin and Melinda that I told them the one funny medically related story I have in my repertoire.  (You remember this:  I had a C-section but had to have a house full of people who came to celebrate Evan's birth and bris, and I was trying to be discreet even with fresh incision pain.  A friend asked me how I felt and I answer:  "OK, but my cut hurts"  Her  jaw drops, eyes widen,  and then says "that's from the episiotomy--it'll go away"  I reply:  "I  had a C-section and there was no episiotomy " and she got embarrassed and said, "Oh..your CUT hurts!") I repeat this just to tell you I am comfortable being myself around Dr. Kevin and Melinda...I was so much myself that when I backed out of the chair(wearing my black and white striped gown) he noticed how much pain I was in before Jim did. The back pain HAD subsided but came back with a vengeance on formal night..a vengeance I could not mask. (Jim thinks it was from moving my seat back and forth so the wait staff had more room) In any event, back pain is not fun.  These two angels went straight to their state room  and came back with Naprosym and handed me some that should get me through the next few days. Now, I'm usually sarcastic when I say "Thank you, Doctor!" but Dr. Kevin(the one who told me there are morgues on ships) stopped the spasms. I can live with the steady  or dull ache but I'd rather ascend the steps of the acropolis in the heat than have back spasms(I realize how ridiculous I sound..about as bad as people who will vote for Hillary because she's the "lesser of two evils" when clearly, Trump is climbing the acropolis in 102 degree heat while carrying a suitcase full of anvils while wearing high heels. and Hillary's "my back hurts a little")  Thanks to Dr. Kevin, I got to sit and enjoy the show called "From Blue Eyes to Buble" but he didn't do much Sinatra...he did Elvis.  Jim asked:  "Did Elvis Presley have blue eyes?" and I answered"he had blood shot eyes" and added: "But he had  blue suede shoes"  and with that, we both drifted into a wonderful and deep sleep.