The Dublin driver, Little Jim and the stateroom..

An interesting morning so far..our cab driver had the wrong hotel but eventually found us. He is from Dublin and was telling us about the rampant crime scene that one used to find in the drug-infested Barcelona. He and his wife and his friend were once leaving a bar when three Moroccans grabbed the guy and picked him up in the air and started hauling him away- which couldn't have happened if he had been nursing Gelatos. But Driver retrieved some broken Guiness bottles from a Dumpster, which was enough to have his friend returned in one piece. We board, and everything's smooth sailing until Jim comes face to face with this big burly security guy. He takes him aside and mumbles something in Spanish before pointing downward, I'm thinking, : "shit..someone's gonna confiscate Little Jim for twelve days" and then thought"at least it's not my straightening iron." Turns out Security Guy was trying to tell Jim that his fly was open.  Things like this I should notice. Since I've been having all these religious experiences, what with going to church twice yesterday, I was wondering why we believe(especially those among us who unequivocally believe) that hell is DOWN and heaven is UP. Whomever came up with this concept obviously never scaled 15 staircases of never ending  steps at a park in Barcelona. I was thinking about the woman who was practically having an orgasm in front of Sagrada Familia.  She had her camera hoisted and tears in her eyes and kept repeating over and over again, "wow..wow..just..WOW!" I was wondering if she, too, saw a sandcastle with penises and had Turrets Syndrome as well. I saw her again, oohing and aching over the stained glass and museum relics and I could only think that in a few short hours I'd be just like her--oohing and aahing over FOOD on the Tapas tour. (Yes, Christine Cherry Hommel, it was fun) What is more awe inspiring than food? But I could NOT have predicted that in a few short hours I'd be walking around in heat..in a meat market. I thought I'd break up the monotony by telling every fish peddler that my grandfather died here in Spain. My Dad always said that my grandfather Albert Levson died battling the regime of Generalissimo Francisco Franco, but now I'm thinking his actual cause of death was touring those endless stands of bananas during a heat wave.. We get a notice that "pipes onboard are sensitive" and I have no idea what that means..until I read further and was told that using too much toilet paper would cause a system blockage that would disrupt the entire vacuum system. Anyone taking bets on what will happen? OK..we're in the room..it is gorgeous with a great balcony and lots of storage space. Everything was fine ..until I saw the bathroom. I will have an easier time climbing the steps in the Acropolis than I will getting into this bathtub! There's no shower so.it's my only option.  I tried to get in..with my Sketchers with their wonderful traction, and it was impossible.  How will this possibly be done wet and naked? Jim said he'd help but he can't even keep track of his own fly for Godsakes! And he's telling me how he must unpack..NOW..and the luggage isn't even here. So no..he won't help me with bathing. This will be interesting..I walked (SIX MILES!!) yesterday and the main attractions to come require even less walking, but I will not be able to get into this tub designed for Amazons. Jim did call for a step stool and I got excited when there was a knock on the door..but it was merely strawberries from our wonderful Travel Agent.  Thanks, Christine!