Free Julius!

This was my favorite day so far, even though I saw no Coneheads and  did not have to inform a single soul that I have a dog named Luke. I did get to dip my toes into the cool Mediterranean waters(this photo was not as nice as some of the beaches we saw) and I explored the promenade and marveled at all the artisans plying their crafts. I had to take several breaks as I'm apparently on the Ibuprofen Tour de France..ugh..me and my stubbornness with unpacking that damn suitcase. I am taking enough Ibuprofen to dull the ache and  at the same time make me eligible for the Betty Ford clinic, but I took in all the sights and smells while Jim watched some yachts. And if wishes come true, many  local pulmonary docs are going to get quite wealthy from all their newly diagnosed emphysema patients.  Second hand smoke bothers me more than back pain. We finally find the famous theater and the walk of stars..reminds me of when I did a similar tour in 1987 with James Donio in Hollywood....hmm..I was pointing to Betty White and he was stepping on?? Hmm..I forget...Jim met some vacationers who were determined to find the red carpet but all we saw was a grey parking garage. But I did see a poster with Ethan Hawke, and this wouldn't be my blog unless I mentioned him. We soon board a mercifully air conditioned bus with people with canes and wheelchairs, where the average age was 92 and the average weight was 432 kilos. My peeps! We tour the beautiful French Riviera, and our guide is pointing out areas where Jack Nicholson and the couple formerly known as Brangelina had homes.  I was having difficulty concentrating(there's a morgue on the ship!) but she said something else about Julius Ceasar and his son-in-law who committed suicide here because of an unfaithful wife or something like that.  Jim hates when I mix facts up but THERE IS A MORGUE ON THE SHIP!.We then head out for a beautiful little town called Frejus and if you've seen "Beauty and the Beast" you've seen this town, what with all the baguettes and cobblestone streets and central fountain  and turrets. And look, I know I don't pay attention(because there is a MORGUE on this ship) and we drove by many signs that said "Casino" and here in this charming little town square, I thought we were going to a genuine gaming  Casino.  I should have remembered that from Guadeloupe.."Casino" is a supermarket chain..so where do we wind up but another church.  Jesus H Christ, my third church in two days.  Jim was fascinated by the architecture and acoustics but I couldn't stop thinking about the ice cream, (and the morgue on the ship)  The ice cream was the most amazing thing I ever tasted..I had to order a second scoop but the poor scooper was so confused.  The point is, if you ever get to Frejus, and you are upset because you thought you were going to a casino instead of a church, order the lime. It is even better than the strawberry. Next we stop at a seaside resort called St. Raphael..It had a huge ferris wheel and I vengefully pictured all these half dead senior citizens on it. (Because one was mean to me and claimed I stole his seat)..we buy a refrigerator magnet which caused a little bit of a security thing when we tried to board the ship but I digress. There was a bathroom in town, but the shopkeeper told me the door was malfunctioning.  It wasn't malfunctioning..there was no door.  And damn Jim and forty pound weight loss because years ago, he could have blocked me while this entire town went on with their business as I did mine.. We did find another bathroom.on the beach.  There was a sign that read "It's Forbidden to Wash Their Feet" and nothing flushed.  (But it was better than the doorless toilet, where nothing flushed for what looked like two weeks) That "Forbidden to Wash Feet" sign scared the daylights out of me.  The last part of the trip was the best..(besides the ice cream)  We drove through all the wealthiest communities in the French Riviera, and we saw beautiful homes and pools and mountainsides..mostly those red mountains(from lava, apparently) peppered with greenery and sparkling blue sea.  Yes, Christine Cherry Hommel, I absolutely LOVED sight seeing! People compared the view to ones you'd see in Colorado or Utah. Tomorrow I wake up in Florence. Rumor has it that Barry Williams uttered the same promise to himself almost daily during the second or third season of  filming "The Brady Bunch"