O’ Savannah!

​O’ Savannah!

Oh I took a lot of notes today/ 

because I felt inspired/

But we needed heavy coats today/

Is that why we’re so tired??

O’ Savannah!

You juicy Georgian peach..

But I gotta be real real with y’all

(She ain’t a Club Med beach!)

I had no sightings of my new found friends today, but I did experience a lot of blog-worthy moments in the Peachtree State.

We started with a somewhat strenuous but doable ( because there wasn’t humidity) Civil War exploration tour. There were many steep steps and uneven surfaces and cobblestones, but I was fine.

The guide was kind of meh.. he talked too fast and walked too fast and couldn’t even answer my question about Savannah’s largest import. 

If he were my high school history teacher, we’d have spiked his coffee thermos and egged his car so if you really want details about the War Between the States, just google Abe Lincoln for a live Q and A. 

Hr did take us to a historical church, the house of worship of some  ex presidents and Forrest Gump.  ( who, coincidentally, is also a friend of many ex presidents!) 

This was the third time I’ve been in a church this year, so when in Rome..

( I didn’t just pray for a booking date that I deserve for WOF this time, I prayed that congress grows a spine this week)

The guide  did point out the  spot where there once was a bench( aka movie prop) that Forrest Gump sat  on while waiting for that bus, telling his whole life story to total strangers, which I just did last night. 

The city of Savannah built an actual bench replica, but too many tourists blocked traffic for photo ops, so it was removed. 

But I’m still seeing that floating white feather and hearing those stirring violins chords of the unforgettable score. 

Oh, before I forget!!

Thank you, Evan, Michelle, and Allan for all your help with the Genius  Game. 

You three are still geniuses, but I’ve got the IQ of Forrest Gump because I saw “ one H on a U” as  “ one handle on an umbrella” when in reality it’s “ one horn on a unicorn.” 

Thanks guys, but that’s all I have to say about that. 

The afternoon excursion to the American Prohibition Museum was much more exciting, despite the dreaded small talk on the trolley that took us there. 

I’m just not into smiling politely and laughing politely at corny jokes, which I refer to as “ corn-a-graphy.”

I never denied I have the tastebuds of a child, which is why anything alcoholic tastes like floor cleaner to me.

(I’m the adult in the ice cream shop ordering flavors like bubblegum and cotton candy)

But just because I don’t imbibe doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy a museum that’s all about alcohol and prohibition. 

( I’d go to a museum dedicated to murderers and masturbators too… doesn’t mean I necessarily have to be one)

The museum reminded me of the best we’ve seen in Hollywood.. dramatic lighting and hilarious placards and wax figures in dazzling costumes.  It was all sounds of muted horns and tin Lizzie’s that transported you back to the 1920’s, in a totally immersive and wonderful experience. 

Everyone was given tons of details about the era of flappers and speakeasies, of bootleggers and Al Capone. 

And mostly everybody gathered in an authentic saloon at the end of the tour,  where they were given a complimentary tumbler of bourbon served by a bartender who looked like Pauley Perrette, meaning they forgot every story they had just been told about these roaring twenties. 

I myself wondered if I were alive during that time if I’d cast a vote like a “wet” or a “ dry” voter did, but as a female, I couldn’t vote at all. 

( prohibition was all about politics)

My vote would depend on my day-of-the-week unmentionable. 

Seriously, if you’re ever in Savannah, check this out. 

I do believe WC Fields  and  Dean Martin were there.. at least in “spirit”

The captain just announced that our scheduled stop at Hilton Head tomorrow is cancelled due to high wind conditions.

We’re going instead to Port Royal, South Carolina.

You know as much about the place as I do at this point… but stay tuned.

I’m so looking forward to tonight’s ventriloquist!